How to Stop Rushing in the Morning, Even with ADHD
I’m sure you’ve heard it all… Create a list, manage your time better, wake up earlier… if only it were that easy.
So why is it that easy for some people and not for others?
The answer might lie in an executive functioning skill called working memory. Working memory is what allows your brain to hold and move information in your mind for a short period of time. This skill is essential for various cognitive tasks, such as:
Following multi-step instructions: Working memory allows you to remember each step while you complete the task.
Solving complex problems: It enables you to keep track of relevant information and consider different solutions.
Making decisions: Working memory helps you weigh the pros and cons of different options.
Learning new information: It's essential to keep information in mind while you process and connect it to existing knowledge.
The goal is not to try to improve your working memory so that you can hold humanly impossible number of tasks in your brain at a time. Research suggests that most people can hold about four chunks of information at once, and that’s for folks withOUT executive deficits.
There are other executive functions that work alongside working memory, such as:
Attention: The ability to focus on relevant information and filter out distractions.
Inhibition: The ability to control impulses and resist distractions.
Task switching: The ability to switch between tasks and adapt to changing demands.
Psychological flexibility
All of these executive functions work together to support complex thinking goal-directed behavior and psychological flexibility. It involves:
Shifting perspectives: Seeing a problem from different angles.
Generating new ideas: Coming up with creative solutions.
Adapting to feedback: Adjusting your approach based on new information.
Psychological flexibility is the ability to adjust your thinking or strategies in response to new, unexpected, or changing situations. It's about being able to think outside the box, consider different perspectives, and adapt your approach when necessary.
Usually, this concept is used against those of us with ADHD. We’re told we’re being rigid and inflexible when we don’t quickly conform to the expectations of others at work or home. So please hear me when I say: psychological flexibility is NOT about changing what you want and need to fit someone else’s demands. It’s actually about knowing yourself SO WELL and giving yourself what you want and need regularly so that you can be flexible when the world throws you unexpected challenges. You get to decide which challenges are worth bending for and how you want to show up while tackling said challenges.
Ex: Adapting to feedback doesn’t mean you will now do exactly as someone else has you to do. If your partner tells you to stop making demands of them (stop asking them to clean their socks off the floor, stop asking them to be home on time, etc) or being late to your commitments with them… this doesn’t mean you have to immediately stop everything you’re doing and change how you navigate the world. It means you will hear what they have to say, consider their perspective, and then decide if making a small change in the direction of their request benefits both you and them. If it’s mutually beneficial, and if you can manage your feelings of shame, then it becomes easier to make changes.
Note on the impact of childhood experiences: If you felt a lot of shame growing up for getting sidetracked, losing focus, and forgetting things, the stress response involved with shame can further exacerbate the problem. That’s why normalizing and self-compassion is such an important part of this process. Shame prevents us from learning.
The Skill:
Visualization.
If you struggle with creating mental images, skip to the next section for troubleshooting tips.
Visualization has been researched extensively, and it helps you tune out the "shoulds" and focus on your "wants." Picture yourself waking up in the morning with the ability to move slowly and easily through your house, putting breakfast together, getting yourself and the kids ready for work/school, and driving to your locations without gripping the steering wheel and cursing the clock.
By picturing this success in your mind, you're not just dreaming – you're planting a seed, and this is where it all begins. You might imagine someone you know who does this well already and use the image of them to help you tap into your own images.
P.S. What you want and what you need are often two sides of the same coin. As you tune into your desires through visualization, you'll also start to understand your deeper needs. Maybe that promotion you crave really represents a desire for more challenge and growth. Maybe the desire to stop rushing around the house is an invitation to slow down other areas of your life too. Visualization helps bridge the gap between your inner world and the outer world, bringing you closer to a life that feels fulfilling on all levels.
Visualization isn't a one-size-fits-all solution. It’s just one tool in the toolbox. If you’re ready to discover more tools to help manage your ADHD, contact The Chronic Illness Therapists. Our ADHD therapists are here to provide you with a safe and supportive environment.
Some people struggle to create mental images, and that's perfectly okay! Here are some alternative strategies for someone with ADHD to avoid the morning rush:
Create a Sensory Script:
Instead of visualizing, create a detailed script that engages multiple senses. Describe the sounds of your alarm clock, the feeling of stretching in bed, and the smell of your coffee brewing. This sensory experience can be just as effective as visualization for planning and reducing decision fatigue.
Watch a YouTuber or someone you know:
Instead of trying to create images from scratch, use the internet to help you out! Find someone on YouTube who does morning routines, clean with me videos, and other lifestyle videos, and then use the energy from those videos to help you tap into the part of you that wants the same things for yourself.
Additional tips from an Atlanta ADHD Therapist:
Use a Physical Checklist:
Write down each step of your morning routine on a checklist or sticky note. Goblin Tools is a fantastic tool to help with this. Place it where you'll see it first thing in the morning (like on your bathroom mirror). Checking off completed tasks provides a sense of accomplishment and keeps you on track.
BUT remember not to take it too concretely. You don’t need to check off each item every single day. Our needs fluctuate day to day, and that’s perfectly normal.
Utilize Technology:
There are numerous apps and smart speakers that can help create a calming morning routine. Use features like sunrise alarms, calming music playlists, or automated reminders for tasks like making breakfast.
Body Doubling:
Find an accountability buddy – a friend, family member, or roommate – who can join you for part of your morning routine. This can be anything from having breakfast together to walking to the bus stop. Having someone else involved can improve focus and reduce the urge to rush.
Focus on "Priming" the Night Before:
Set yourself up for success by preparing the night before.
BUT remember - it’s not about completely as much as possible the night before. It’s about working WITH your energy and needs. Personally, I hate planning food the day before. I much prefer to make breakfast and lunch the day of, so I made sure to make those tasks a part of my morning routine. If you’re cool with thinking about it the night before, then I would definitely suggest doing it the night before.
Prepping what you can the night before allows you to focus on completing tasks in the morning rather than planning them.
Learn even more tips & tricks in online ADHD therapy
If your mornings feel like a chaotic rush despite your best efforts, it might be time to embrace a new approach tailored to your ADHD brain. If the traditional advice doesn't work for you, there are ADHD-friendly strategies that can make a world of difference. If you’re ready to learn more tips on how to stop the morning rush, begin ADHD therapy in Atlanta, GA.
Follow these three steps to reclaim your mornings:
Learn more about ADHD through our blogs or The Chronic Illness Podcast.
Start your day with ease & confidence with a tailored morning routine just for you!
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